Here's the day you hoped would never come
Don't feed me violins
just run with me through roads of speeding cars.
The papercuts the cheating lovers
The coffee's never strong enough
i know you think it's more than just bad luck

There there baby
it's just text book stuff
it's in the ABC of growing up

Gnugh..

My bf has been talking about dropping uni to join the police, and I was in full support of him cause I think he'd really enjoy being a cop more than finishing his computer science degree, he's a black belt etc and one of his old karate masters (the same guy who taught me self-defence) also used to teach police here some defence kinda stuff, plus he has some family friends who are cops so I guess he just likes the idea

anyways, it sounds like the kinda thing he'd love to do and be really good at, so I was like yeah cool go for it

well, he dropped a bit of a bombshell last night, if he does get accepted for the police training program then he has to go to the north island for 5 months

-headdesk- -headdesk- -headdesk- -headdesk-

he's really serious about us being together, and he wants us to still be together when he's gone... I mean maybe I could cope with a long distance relationship for that long I'm just scared that I'll wait 5 months and then realise one or both of us don't feel the same way anymore. He's pretty fucking serious about us being together though, it scares me half to death just because I've only recently had a long-term relationship end and I'm not ready for another one. Like, I know this guy had a thing for me for the past 2 years or so, but we only got together about a month ago, and last night he brought up the fact that if we're still together when I finish uni and go to Japan we'd have to be apart for 6 months/12 months depending how long I teach for. I nearly died, seriously, it's 3 years til I finish uni ;_; This guys done everything to prove to me that he really cares about me, but I just don't know how he can possibly feel that strongly. It scares the shit out of me ): I don't even want to think about whether I'll be in a relationship with any guy at the end of uni, because I really don't know where I'll be spending the rest of my life, and if I have to leave someone behind... ;_;

He's a really good guy, and I know he'd never do anything to hurt me, but he is so serious about us and I just don't understand it. He tried to tell me he was falling in love with me, but the l-word just about has me reaching for a strait-jacket these days. I don't want to go there ever again I really don't

5 months without him ggggaaahhh why must everybody grow up and start their careers D: stupid 'get better work stories' campaign that convinces kids to join the police (it worked on my cousin too)

ffs... when am i going to catch a break...

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never regret something which once made you smile